There is no easy way to write this. A lot of it will be difficult to accept, and you may wonder what the proof for any of this is. You may need some time away from the community for a bit to come to terms with this, and there is no shame in that. For the past three weeks, I have been less active because of this situation and my involvement in figuring out a peaceful resolution to it. If I have not told you about the situation, it is because it was not yet resolved with no clear conclusion as of yet. This announcement is part of that conclusion.
A Theory And Two Pictures
This story starts with a theory that D33 shared with me, and my initial reaction was roughly, “Oh God, D33 is telling me about a conspiracy theory suggesting these people are the same person.” The problem is, it turned out to be no wacky theory, it turned out to be true. Someone in a community that D33 shares found out directly from the person behind several aliases in the MAP community that they – most commonly known as Rainbow – were posing as several aliases, or sock puppets.
Naturally, the person who met Rainbow got suspicious about some things after that. So D33 asks me in DM if I could share some pictures with people who might know what Rainbow looks like. I shared one – and they were pretty certain that was Rainbow. So I shared another, and again they were pretty certain.
Except those were images that Khed shared with people.
At this point, the person – who I will refer to as Rainbow for simplicity – has admitted to operating these personas to a group of people who are staff in various communities.
After confirming the initial two pictures, we put together a group chat of 8 people from multiple servers to discuss it further, and we confirmed their identities as the following: Khed, bbyodakid, Slaughter’s Laughter/J, and Rainbow. The stated reason by Rainbow was that they simply wanted attention, and that getting that attention is partly how they coped with depression, not to be malicious and not to be cruel. This individual already has a therapist.
Essentially, at this point, one thing is especially clear: “Rainbow” did not attempt suicide. There may be more deceptions connected to these aliases that have led to people in the community being hurt and feeling ostracized.
Allegations were made against me for supposedly being pro-contact. My views on the contact issue have not changed in four years. It is unlikely that my views will change, though part of my mission is to ensure people have support. That cannot happen if groups of people are so stigmatized they feel they cannot access support. That includes shaming and ostracizing people for having pro-contact views. I believe the narrow path, the one where we ignore views we disagree with and support the person when they need support, is the correct one.
This person has been banned from MAP Support Club, and from another community. I personally feel that they should be welcome – as themselves – to still talk to whoever is willing to support them, on an individual basis. I am willing to support their mental health, if they choose to seek it. I do not support the deception or the harm that they caused. I hope they realize the magnitude of the pain they have brought on so many people. However, I could not stand by my mission statement – or the mental health support of people I disagree with, or the mental health support I believe those who commit sexual offenses deserve – if I did not extend that same mental health support to “Rainbow.”
Rainbow has indicated a desire to delete all of their personas and leave the community. However, I personally hope that they continue to reach out to people to support their mental health and better themselves as a person.
As a natural result of this, some of you might have question of whether or not the MAP community is safe. I believe it is, when we follow best practices and each take responsibility for safeguarding our information and our privacy. One of those best practices is not sharing information with people until you have known them for at least several months, if not over a year. That best practice would not have helped in this particular case, but it is still a good practice to observe.
I will be staying. I have no reason to believe that Rainbow ever intended to use any information they had. I knew there would be difficult situations when I entered this community, and this situation was not the first and I am sure will not be the last. So again, take some time off, get support, talk to people, and come back refreshed.